Has your child ever lied? Maybe yes several times. Children tend to like to tell things that are too exaggerated or the child tells an event that was added to his imagination, however, if without proper action, lying can be a bad habit. Children lie can be caused by various reasons. The following are the most common reasons for lying children.
The reason children lie
Here are three main reasons why children lie:
1. Children use their imagination to tell stories
Did your child ever tell you that he was going to the moon? Or does your child tell you that he can ride a cloud?
Children have a high and beautiful imagination. Sometimes children present their fantasies as the truth. Usually he imagines according to what he has heard, like from fairy tales or seeing in cartoons.
If your child has a habit of telling imagination that comes from a fairy tale world, you can respond with non-judgmental answers. For example, "Is that something you want to happen or does it really happen?" Non-judgmental questions will encourage your child to admit it.
Even so, having imagination is not always bad. Help your child to direct his imagination. Tell your child that he can still tell great stories, as long as he explains that the story is only his hopes or desires.
2. Children want to avoid punishment
Has your child secretly taken a piece of cake on the table, but did not admit it, even though it appeared to have leftover cake marks on his face?
Maybe this is similar to the way adults lie to avoid fighting with a partner. Likewise, children lie usually to avoid punishment. He is afraid if you are honest, you will be angry or punish him.
If you find out your child is lying, offer one chance to tell the truth.
If in fact you often catch children lying, try to see again how you discipline it so far. Is it too firm and hard or vice versa. Because in some studies it is known that children will tend to lie when they are very afraid of their parents who are too hard.
3. Children want to look cool in front of other people
Other reasons children lie also because they want to impress others. Your child might tell his friends that he can score the most goals while playing soccer. Or your child tells you that he gets the highest math score in his school, even when it's not true.
Exaggerating the truth or even lying is often used to cover up their mistrust. In an effort to adjust to their peers, children sometimes insist that they have to experience the same experiences with their friends, or that they try to impress their friends with their stories.
If your child has a habit of lying to look good in front of other people, he may need recognition from others.
Talk to your child about the consequences of lying and ask your child to talk according to their circumstances. Help him find ways to connect with others without lying about his experience.
Praise his efforts, not the results so he will recognize the value of his hard work. For example, instead of praising him for getting the most goals at a soccer match, praise him for trying hard. Point out to him that he doesn't need to be the best to get recognition from others or look cool in front of other people.
How to respond when you catch a child lying
Sometimes, it might be appropriate to have additional consequences for children lying. In addition, make honesty a priority in your home. Make a house rule that says, "Tell the truth," and your children will be more likely to realize the importance of being honest.